Saturday, November 24, 2012

darkness darkness


...in which our plucky heroine does make progress, albeit slowly

Finished the crow shirt yesterday. The neckline applique continues down the front panel. The entire design was done as one large piece of reverse applique, and then applied to the body. The shirt itself is machine stitched; the applique and edgebinding are all hand stitched.


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The cuff edge of the shirt has a simpler design, but it is easier to see how the construction works. The reverse applique layers are added to the body, and then an additional binding is stitched along the edge.

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Crow shirt worn under black pinafore, and only the small ovals are visible, for a more subtle decorative effect. Being able to get two rather different "looks" from one shirt makes the piece more versatile. I'd like to say that this was intentional, but was rather more serendipitous... However, it is certain that our plucky heroine will use this concept (of placing a primary motif just low enough to not show above the neckline edge, and adding a more subtle edge border along the neck and cuffs) again...

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Crow shirt worn over black pinafore, for a slightly more casual look. A year or two ago I realised that a shirt worn over a pinafore works like top + skirt... This allows for additional combinations without requiring additional garments. While this might not work for everyone, or even for most folks, it suits my idiosyncratic preferences quite well.

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Has been a week or more of sinking into internal darkness, despite best efforts of self otherwise. Sorrow dogs my footsteps far beyond forty days in the bardo. I once thought I knew what the story was, and then it changed. Now it feels more akin to the sort of fairytale where after a visit underhill, no earthly commonality has a nourishing savor any longer.

I watch with care and attention the beauty of the bright world, and enjoy my own company, but how I wish for something more. I am not hanging on, mind knows clear that the door back to that particular happiness is forever barred. Perhaps the day will come when the memory fades of how it felt to have that internal spark, a flame of lovelight to warm my spirit. A day for every week, a week for every month, a month for every year...

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2 comments:

  1. I love your shirt and the combos that you've put together with it. And I ache with sorrow for you. I pray that the solstice and the new year will bring joy to you.

    JoyceP in WI

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  2. I've already gushed over your shirt on SG but I want to gush some more. It is divine! You will be crowned Queen of the Crows!

    This is the worst time of year for dark sinking moods, no matter what their unique source for the sufferer. You are not alone even though you feel deeply alone. I have spent many seasons in the place you are visiting. It is very inhospitable, and I'm sending many strong good thoughts your way.

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