Monday, November 28, 2011

where is that spoon...

in which our plucky heroine is the recipient of bad news...

I am not real happy right now, got test results back this afternoon, not what I'd hoped for. Kinda in shock, kinda resigned, kinda upset, kinda distracted. Tonight I lost my key ring with the keys to the house on it, between leaving the house to go cat-sit, and getting off the bus coming home. It was dark, and cold, and all the spare keys to Acorn Cottage are with various folks that live in other states. So I decided to backtrack my steps, and amazingly found the keys about a block off Lombard, in the street, about five miles from home. Yay for small miracles!

Now I get more hoops for jumping through, and an unknown different doctor, and a bunch more medical/surgical foo. I figured that the results were not good, when instead of a cheery call saying "all is well, see you at the post-surgery checkup in a week and a half", I got a message to call the doctor's office... and when I did, I sat on hold for over an hour... I think they forgot I was there.... then I finally talked with Dr D. She is a good doctor, and a pretty good communicator. (I hope that whoever I get sent to is not only a good doctor, but will be able to look me in the eyes and speak in a way I can comprehend, and will hear my concerns)

I guess it is good, that they did not find actual cancer cells, though I am aware that there is a broad continuum from normal and healthy, to obviously wrong, and my cells, at least the ones they looked at, are only kinda pretty badly messed up... (The big words are "complex hyperplasia with atypia" for those who know what that actually means) The recommendation is for a hysterectomy. I will know more once I talk to the new doctor, the gyno-oncologist...

This story of mine is starting to feel a bit like quicksand, that the further things go, the deeper and more dangerous it becomes, and the harder to get back to my nice safe regularly scheduled life.

Hopefully in a few days I will have regained some semblance of equanimity...

a reminder to self, that beyond the fog of unknown future,
lie the hills of home and the light of the morning

dog is awake
with hackles up


  1. Grrrrr...Non cancerous but they want to do surgery anyways? Allison, all good to you. What can do you do next?

  2. Get a second opinion on the total hysterectomy. Often they can do a sectional removal (if it is the cervix, I'm just guessing here).

    I went through a similar scare in January, had surgery but came through OK, if you ever need to chat, let me know.

    In any event, prayers coming your way.

  3. Given my diagnosis, I feel that the gynecologic-oncologist recommending surgery makes sense. Not the trip I want to take, but the trip I will be taking nonetheless.

    Knowing that you have also taken a similar journey cheers me a lot, and your prayers even more so.